WTF? You're Still Here?: Familiarity Breeds Contempt

There was a time when things pressure sore were a lot easier to lampoon, but that ship is loaded for bear and untied from its moorings. The wind is blowing like stink and she's about to set sail. We had our fun I guess: this handy visual aide comes to mind. But that was back in the halcyon, autumnal days of aught-seven, when this sore was just a ragged, odorous, weeping, infected mess. I took the professional advice and followed the proper course of action. A corrective procedure here; a ten week course of antibiotics there; the New Year held promise of good tidings, but 'twas not to be. "We're very, very close. I can feel it." Give it a second go-round and we'll nip this thing in the bud. What's six more weeks, anyway? That was January. Yeah...Not so much. It's like this: They really should have stopped after Police Academy 2. Let's see: Mahoney is the comedian, Hightower is tall and strong, Tackleberry loves guns and Jones tricks people with sound effects. Oh, and Callahan has huge Js, but you never really get to see them. We get it! Guttenberg even called it quits after Four and yet they still kept plugging along. But what other ideas are there? And so back into the breech... So, No, Cube, even though I did not have to use my AK, today was most definitely not a good day.

Little Miss Dromedary

This is real.

ABU DHABI (AFP) - More than 10,000 camels from across the Gulf will be competing for millions of dollars in prize money at a beauty pageant for the "ship of the desert" in Abu Dhabi next week.

The contest is part of a camel festival being staged from Wednesday in the capital of the United Arab Emirates which aims to celebrate and preserve the region's cultural
heritage.

Camels from Bahrain, Kuwait, Oman, Qatar and Saudi Arabia will strut their stuff before a panel of expert judges who will decide which owners should be awarded prize money totalling around 9.5 million dollars. One hundred cars are also up for grabs.

According to the Neilsen TV ratings, the camel beauty pageant is much more popular among male viewers in Abu Dhabi than the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show, which aired in December. When asked why this might be, one young pageant fan surmised, "Well...You get to see like 4 times as much camel toe."

THANK YOU! GOODNIGHT!